Don’t Dream It. Be It!

“We gotta pretty yourself up some,” the woman who hired me at my first strip club told me after I worked my first shift. “If these guys wanted to look at the girl next door they’d just peep on their neighbor. It’s a lot cheaper. Get yourself some jewelry. Right now when you take your clothes off, it’s just… you.”

Ouch!

She was right, though. As it was my job to sell a fantasy, I had to give up on the idea that it was sufficient merely to parade around with my clothes off in order to pull of the whole stripper thing. Half-assing it was not only disrespecting the club I worked for, but disrespecting myself. I followed her advice and bought some jewelry: flashy, trashy rhinestones that caught the light and drew attention to the lines of my body. I got an expensive haircut and learned how to use a curling iron. I bought a few packages of false eyelashes and practiced with them until I could practically put them on in my sleep. I went tanning and bought green eyeshadow. After a few weeks of trial and error, I eventually looked the part when I was at work. This served not only to help me look more like a stripper, but to behave with a stripper’s confidence in her artifice, her act, her fantasy–because I knew I looked the part. I’m not saying that you should turn yourself into a stripper. On the street, during the day, for instance, the whole false eyelashes look is more likely to turn heads in a we’re-questioning-your-gender way rather than a positive one. But what I’m saying is this: if there are things you know that you could do in order to make yourself a more glamorous, visually stimulating woman and this is who you want to be, don’t imagine that someone will hand you a cookie after you die for abstaining from doing them. Who is to say that feeling sexy and confident isn’t important? If you want to embody these qualities, you have to look as though you already possess them in spades, and looking this way will require some kind of effort because successful effort is the stuff from which confidence is made. If you want the confidence, do the work. This is non-negotiable.

Tagged with: control men | seduce a man | seduce man